Baking stresses me out. I’ve lived in my home for over a year and I am still not entirely sure how to turn off the top heating element in my oven. It’s too fancy and efficient for me. I don’t understand how it works and haven’t really taken the steps to figure out how to understand. Someday. (Edit: I figured it out.)

This book has a multitude of desserts and about six of them are pies. Unless you’re The Rock, the only acceptable time to eat pie is between November 20 and December 27th. That’s too little a time frame to make six different pies. Plus, some of the recipes are for specific pie lovers. There’s a recipe for something called “Millionaire Pie” and also one for banana cream pie which I am pretty sure no one likes. If you’re that person, let me know and I will make you your very own BCP.

I settled on making Mankind’s Pumpkin Pie for my office’s annual Pie Day. Without a doubt, it is my favorite day at the office and I don’t even really like pie, but I love food and celebrations! Pies are ordered from Petsi Pies, a local, delicious bakery and employees can bring in pies to share and auction off to benefit one of our giving programs at the agency. I bought a giant can of Pumpkin Pie filling at our office’s Senior Pet Store, which sells donated items from the local Target to benefit the program of the same name. With enough pumpkin for two pies, I brought in one to share and one to auction. Kinda. You’ll see.

Before I ventured on this task, I tweeted at Mankind himself, Mick Foley, to do some investigating as to the legitimacy of this recipe. He didn’t respond, but it got a “like!”

I expected more from my friend, Mick Foley. Back in 2010 I met him at a book signing at the BU Barnes and Noble (Awesome Kong/Kharma was also hanging out there, btw.) I’ll admit I wasn’t that familiar with Foley’s in ring work, but I’d read his first three books and loved them. He read from the chapter from “Countdown to Lockdown” in which he discusses his love of listening to Tori Amos’ “Winter” pre-match. When it came time to have him sign my book I could only muster a “I love Tori Amos, too.”

He stopped writing and slowly looked up. “Really?” And that began a ten minute long conversation between Foley and I about our favorite songstress which ended when the book store staff told me that I had to move along so other people could meet him.

I was almost out the door when he called me back in and asked me to lean down towards his good ear. “I just wanted to let you know that you did a really good job. We love not talking about wrestling sometimes.” I’m terrible at meeting famous people so I feel like I redeemed myself.

Foley is probably the best human on the planet. Not only is he engaging, sweet and funny, but he is a volunteer with RAINN (Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network), an infrequent correspondent on The Daily Show, a best selling author and a Christmas obsessed wannabe Santa Claus. He is the best.

Why should this pumpkin pie be any different? Even if it’s not from Foley himself (I read the contributions in the book), it appeared to be a standard pumpkin pie recipe. I rolled out the pie crust without issue, but I need to work on my edging technique. Next time.

“Think I’ll remember those pies pies pies. Pies pies pies pies.” – Usher on Thanksgiving.

The pies came out looking a little overdone because of the top heating element and they didn’t look done in the middle when I the timer went off. When I put the knife in, a pretty good chunk of the pumpkin came out with it. I tried to make this look less jank on the other pie by trying to drawn an X and it may have worked. It’s what’s on the inside that counts.

And I have to say. The pie is delicious. I know this because once I realized that I had sliced a line in the pie while checking it’s doneness, I just cut a piece out and ate it. Then I had a slight panic attack about having to bring this in to share with other people so I cut another small piece. This is not normal. I was able to mask this during the presentation by saying that if I ever bring a baked good to your house and a piece is missing, you know I tested it and it’s the bomb.

My co-workers also seemed to like the pie and at auction it sold for $25. I would’ve been happy with anything above $5. Hopefully her friends and family enjoyed it at their Thanksgiving celebration!

So, what to watch when you eat this pie? I would highly recommend 1998’s Survivor Series. The event takes place the weekend before Thanksgiving and Mankind participates in the WWF Championship Tournament facing The Rock, Stone Cold and some others.

I would absolutely make this recipe again. Pumpkin Pie is one of those intimidating recipes, but let me give you a pep talk: You can do this. Just learn from my mistakes. And remember to wear an oven mitt when you take the pie out of the over. If you don’t have one. A Mr. Socko will do.

From Sportsmockery.com

Have a nice day!

Record: 9 wins, 3 loses.